Nothing screams Easter like a haiku competition. We asked you to send in haikus and you did, in moderate numbers, so thanks. While only the top 20 could be published and only the top 5 get tote bags, we were in equal parts inspired and depressed by all of them. If you wrote one of the poems in the top 5, email features@critic.co.nz or message our Facebook to claim your tote bag.
You sent us haikus
We laughed, counted syllables
Art is beautiful
- Critic Te Arohi
Top 20
I shit my pants on
Castle street I regret it
drugs can suck my nuts
- A participant of sex
winter draws near now
time to stop buying long whites
here come the long nights
- Oscar
Health scis in the lib
Body parts on MacBook screens
When will their dreams die?
- Sean
Drinking all break long
get my school shit done in time?
Not a fucking chance
- Jesse
I WRITE THIS REPORT
WHAT THE FUCK IS A D-LOOP
JUDGEMENT AT MIDNIGHT
- Nicholas
Friend request from Kate-
Invite to join Sign-Up Club.
Unfriend. Fuck off Kate.
- Ben
My flatmates never
Change the toilet paper roll
I want to change flats
- Briar
I run up and down
Flights of stairs in Richardson,
Because lifts scare me.
- Lauren
The UberEats guy,
On my front doorstep again.
(I just love dumplings)
- Lauren
Sexy rubber shoes
Good for sleeping or standing
Have sex in your crocs
- Ku
I wrote a haiku
I wrote it for the Critic
They did not like it
- Dave
In my flat alone
I will study for mid terms
Oops I am now drunk
- Matt
Bless that one student
Asking dumb questions again,
So we don’t have to.
- Lauren
To the bestest Bills
Quack Quack Quack Quack Quack Quack Quack
Spread the love my dudes
- Karna
Goon mixed with a sprite
A cheap way to get wasted
Dollar per standard
- John
Winners
My flat loves hummus
We have a big wall of lids
There are thirty lids
- Avery
Write your wanton words
A harsh critic tells the truth;
Mullets are not hot
- Phoebe
There is nothing like
A Crown, for picking it up
And putting it down
- Liam
It's so long and hard
And I'm about to get fucked
Essay due midnight
- Romy
Richardson Building
Comfortingly robust frame
Cold concrete tower
- Simon