Nintendo’s Animal Crossing the perfect escape tool from the cruel reality of Covid, Uni stress, depression, the housing market and the loss of Harlene. It’s also a genuinely fun game to play. Each game hosts cute wee villagers, which are anthropomorphic animals. For you commerce students out there, Anthropomorphic means "animals that act like humans”, think Brian from Family Guy.
Law - Shari
This villager was based on the Squirrel Monkey, a monkey that pisses on its own hands and feet to establish territory. If there's a student who can establish boundaries and make up shit rules, whilst pissing all over their hands and feet, it's a law student. Imagine playing Animal Crossing, a game that everyone's raving about, just to be abandoned on an island with a monkey with wet, yellow hands. That feeling must be the same level of disappointment as meeting a Law Student in real life.
Politics - Pietro
Politics students are smart enough to want to study politics but silly enough to think it peaks with the New Zealand National Election every 3 years. The climax of your studies culminating once every normal degree-length, or twice if you're unlucky, must be pretty epic. Politics Students finally have something to talk about at parties, fun. But if you take a step back, they're still voids of charisma: depressed clown studies.
Computer Science - Sprocket
Sprocket is a fucking robot. A robot ostrich, possibly designed after the Computer Science term Ostrich Algorithm, where a programmer will bury their head in the sand and ignore any errors in code. Computer Science students must be stoked to read Comp Sci jargon on paper for once. Or if you're reading this on Critic.co.nz, go back to mining Bitcoin, genius.
First Year Health Science - Rodney
Look at this idiot, good grief. Voted the worst Animal Crossing Villager by such esteemed websites as Nintendsoup, Gamerant, Screenrant, DenOfGeek and about four or five more. When I googled this ugly motherfucker, I discovered that this squeamish knob is way out of his comfort zone and well over his head, which is just like every HSFY student I've ever had the (dis)pleasure of knowing. Buckle up Rodney's, it'll be a tough 1 to 12 years but you'll get there eventually.
PE - Roald
Men wanna be him, ladies wanna be with him, and everyone else is begging him to move into their island. He hits the gym on the regular, hence his Jock personality, yet he remains a wee chunky chirper. Also, this arctic bird has a major substance abuse issue, with eyes as big as dinner plates. This wee villager represents PE students, the department with the ability to put away drugs and alcohol like they work in customs.
Polytechnic - Gulllivarrr
A pirate seagull? You fucking bet. Every polytech student can easily put away some chips at the beach, swashbuckle their way through the seven seas or become King of the Pirates if their heart desire. Polytech students are simply built different. Your free (apprentice)ship is now called The Flying Dutchman, the way you’ll be flying to an actual job once you graduate from Polytech.
Harlyne Hayne
She is Tom Nook.
Art History - Redd
This guy isn't even a villager, he's an art dealer that hustles you fake art to make your island look bougie. I'm not powerful or cold hearted enough to cut Art History from this list, so the three Art History Graduates out there get a shout-out in the form of this foxy villager. Animal Crossing's painting market might be the one time your Art History degree comes in handy.
Science Communication - Blathers
Blathers is the Museum curating owl, with a wide knowledge of bugs, fossils, Marine Biology and a secret passionate love for Art to top it all off. Just like Science Communication students, this owl has a knowledge of every science. He will shit out random facts that are actually radical, you just need to be drunk to enjoy them.