OUSA pushed its new fair trade message at Tent City on Thursday. The policy, which has been approved by the student body and the University Council, aims to bring predominantly fair trade products to the already laughably overpriced campus shelves.
The smell of freshly-roasted Rwandan coffee beans and bespoke Guadeloupe chocolate bars was even enough to lure Vice-Chancellor Profes- sor Harlene Hayne away from the clutches of her tyrannical secretary and down to the Museum Reserve, where she chatted to the Otago Daily Times and slyly evaded the ace news hound whom Critic had sent to the scene.
Critic was instead cornered by Dunedin City Councillor Teresa Stevenson, who encouraged students to buy fair trade before vowing to kidnap a Critic reporter and take him or her on a tour of the Greggs factory – a threat oddly reminiscent of the scene in Red Dragon in which Philip Seymour Hoffman is glued to a wheelchair and lectured before being set on fire.
Critic hit campus to gain students’ views on the new policy. “Fair trade is the biggest sham since the moon landing,” one respondent fumed. “When you buy fair trade, you’re subsidising Farmer Joe at the expense of Farmer Jim down the road. And the knowledge of the moral wrong you’re committing by enabling the scam makes the coffee taste burned and bitter.”
OUSA Lauches Fair Trade Campaign
