The Dummy's Guide to Travelling to Hawai’i

Posted 11:56am Sunday 8th October 2023

Welcome to the Dummy's Guide to Travelling to Hawai’i, where we'll show you how to turn a dream vacation into a nightmare of confusion, frustration, and inefficiency. Who needs simplicity and relaxation when you can make everything needlessly complex? It's time to discuss the Read more...

Putting the ‘Fuck’ in Whakapapa

Posted 10:08pm Sunday 24th September 2023

There’s a scene in Mean Girls where Karen Smith justifies getting with your cousin. And maybe she had a point. Yeah, it’s probably a pretty desperate move, but in some cases, it’s excusable. You didn’t hear it from me.    They say that forbidden fruit - or in Read more...

Ngāti Pākehā? More like Naughty Pākehā!

Posted 12:19pm Monday 11th September 2023

The descendants of Porourangi are known as Ngāti Porou, and Ngāti Tūwharetoa in the central North Island are, of course, descended from Tūwharetoa. So if ‘Ngāti’ means ‘descended from’, then who the hell is Pākehā?    Many Read more...

Editorial: Te Wiki o Te Reo Māori: Because who needs English, anyway?

Posted 12:17pm Monday 11th September 2023

Ah, Māori Language Week, that time of the year when corporate giants dust off their faux-cultural sensitivity and engage in the shameless game of linguistic Monopoly. It’s almost heartwarming to see these mega-corporations roll the dice to determine which Māori word they’ll Read more...

It’s In Our Roots

Posted 12:14pm Monday 11th September 2023

If you’ve ever done a course on Duolingo, you’ll probably have noticed that the French think shovels are feminine and cheese is masculine. Colonisers, amirite?) But te reo Māori doesn’t really place emphasis on masculine and feminine nouns, and instead garners much of its Read more...

Pussy, Power and the Patriarchy

Posted 8:45pm Sunday 3rd September 2023

Being a boss bitch comes with an asterisk. Even that term, boss bitch, still carries the word “bitch” in it, as if women can’t be in charge without being insufferable. But despite all the resistance, many have forced their way to the top. Like a modern Elle Woods, pushing on in Read more...

Matariki, Mātauranga Māori, and Modern Science

Posted 4:23pm Monday 24th July 2023

In the early years of learning maths and chemistry, posters fill the classroom walls. They’re plastered with motivational slogans like “Music: proof the brain enjoys counting”, “Chemistry is everything”, and “Maths: the secret language of the universe”. Read more...

Opinion: Nepotism: It’s okay if it’s tradition!

Posted 5:58pm Monday 29th May 2023

Exam season may be daunting but, remember, if old mate Charlie can succeed the throne at the overripe age of 74 and still not know his allocated lines, then you can walk off that B+ with your head held high. Despite the archaic, dormant vibe that the British monarchy insists on maintaining in the Read more...

PAID IN FULL WITH BLOOD

Posted 3:53pm Sunday 30th April 2023

Kawiti was tired of digging graves, so he started digging trenches. Amidst a showdown between northern Māori and British forces, the Musket War veteran began construction of an underground fortress. Kawiti’s formidable pā was a never-before-seen bastion, made up of underground Read more...

You Cannot Be What You Cannot See

Posted 11:58am Sunday 16th April 2023

Since the establishment of colonial society in Aotearoa, Māori have remained massively underrepresented within the medical workforce. Despite increases since the 1990s, many Māori are often only able to find employment in entry-level, minimum-wage jobs such as cleaning, caregiving, and Read more...