Moaninful Confession: Seal the Deal

Posted 6:13pm Monday 29th May 2023 by Critic

It was break, and we were spending a few nights at my boyfriend’s parent’s place. Naturally we both were hungry for some alone time. So off we go: “an excursion for fresh air”. We walked and talked, but that just wasn’t cutting it. Next thing I knew, a quiet kiss on the Read more...

Moaningful Confessions: Not begging for moa

Posted 2:53pm Sunday 14th May 2023 by Critic

Music has the ability to bring people together. So do taxidermied moa. And blowjobs. As it turns out, all of the above can also tear people apart and sow weeks of exasperated sighs into your everyday life. Let me explain: It was midnight on a Friday. I was single and “ethically” Read more...

Moaningful Confessions: Dinner and a Show

Posted 2:00pm Sunday 7th May 2023 by Critic

I was travelling recently and, as luck would have it, I was upgraded to the top floor of the Quest apartments by the Old Bank in downtown Wellington. It’s a fancy art deco complex above Starbucks. Class, plenty of room to hang out between adventures in the big city, and bonus: I could spy on Read more...

Moaningful Confessions: Brother-in-law gets fucked hard (by the law)

Posted 1:58pm Sunday 12th March 2023 by Critic

Is this sex related? No. At least not in a good way. But since I can’t afford therapy, winning a free sex toy from Critic for this story is as close as I’ll get.   The story begins back in October when I started receiving TikToks from my mates back home of a girl saying her Read more...

Moaningful Confessions: The threesome that was never meant to be

Posted 2:43pm Sunday 5th March 2023 by Critic

  It started off as any good sexual encounter would: we had all been drinking for three days straight and were feeling somewhere between delirium and death. I had been talking to one co-worker named Jimmy (not his real name) and feeling a bit promiscuous. We had spent the last few days Read more...

Moaningful Confessions | Tap and Gap ASAP

Posted 5:38pm Sunday 26th February 2023 by Critic

It was the Saturday of Re-O and, after a week of pouring rain and a lack of alcohol consumed, I knew tonight was the night I needed to send it. So, obviously the only way to do this was to down as many vodka shots as physically possible. I’m not going to lie, I truly did this to the best of my Read more...