Booze Review | Country Medium White Wine is a most exquisite vintage

Posted 2:09pm Saturday 24th September 2022 by Chug Norris

Goon has a reputation as a low tier, last-resort type of potation. But while this scurrilous reputation may hold true for pretentious European attempts at goon (see Chasseur), the New Zealand-made Country Medium White Wine is a cardboardeaux that excels and excites in taste, mouthfeel and, most of Read more...

The RTDs are coming for you and your loved ones

Posted 8:54pm Sunday 18th September 2022 by Chug Norris

Absolut Lime and Soda beats the record for the most generic RTD ever produced, but it is not alone. RTDs are multiplying at an alarming rate. Wine and beer now cower in the corners of liquor store fridges as piles of multi-coloured boxes with generic names like Grins, Larry, Dave, and Brins spread Read more...

Booze Review | Cody’s Bourbon and Cola is Criminally underrated.

Posted 7:01pm Sunday 11th September 2022 by Chug Norris

Cody’s has many negative associations, several of which are fair. As previous booze reviews have mentioned, it is the drink of choice of 12 year-olds at skate parks throughout the country. For many, the drink is reminiscent of alcohol-fueled injuries and social decay. But these prejudiced Read more...

Booze Review | Steinlager Pure makes an embarrassment of Steinlager Classic

Posted 8:33pm Saturday 3rd September 2022 by Chug Norris

Steinlager Pure is like the younger sibling that outshines their elder in every way. Despite the marketing for both drinks being so similar that even experienced piss fiends would confuse them, the Pure version of Steinlager is infinitely better than its Classic cousin. But the quality of Pure also Read more...

Conservation Heroes Buy 40 Boxes of Purple Gs

Posted 3:02pm Friday 19th August 2022 by Fox Meyer

This week, we got a Snapchat of some local conservationists supporting the endangered Purple Goanna. We reached out to these intrepid environmentalists to see what inspired them to make such big sacrifices for such little reptiles.  When we asked Rico, Angus and Ben how many boxes of Purple Read more...

Booze Review | Bavaria Dark 8.6ers are an atrocious drink, but at least they’re not a rip off

Posted 5:18pm Friday 19th August 2022 by Chug Norris

Some of the best things in life are free, but some of the worst things in life come in at 0.95 dollars per standard. It must be said: massive respect to Bavaria for being one of the few drinks other than goon that can consistently deliver golden ratio prices, but it has to be asked: is the misery Read more...

Booze Review | Scapegrace Pomegranate & Doris Plum is a Pretentious Money-Grab

Posted 3:09pm Monday 15th August 2022 by Chug Norris

There is only one way a person could come to buy Scapegrace’s Pomegranate and Doris Plum RTDs: fresh from an exhausting day of abusing retail workers and making disapproving noises about the homeless, your average Scapegrace consumer is in much need of refreshment. Getting home and realising Read more...

Booze Review | Major Major Blended Kentucky Bourbon

Posted 4:49pm Sunday 31st July 2022 by Chug Norris

Let’s be honest, it really doesn’t take a lot of effort to make people buy alcohol in NZ. Major Major’s Blended Kentucky Bourbon drink is not a particularly innovative move by Asahi. They’ve just bought a bottle of bourbon and watered it down with some lemon soda. But Read more...

Blame Putin for RTD Shortage

Posted 5:56pm Monday 25th July 2022 by Ruby Werry

If you’ve noticed getting your hands on Diesels or Billy Mavs has been harder recently, you’re not alone, and you’re not wrong. International shortages of bourbon have been causing prices to spike. While the spirit is adored by middle-aged men and those who are middle-aged men at Read more...

Hangover Cures

Posted 2:16am Saturday 9th July 2022 by Critic

Over the break, some of our reporters decided to try a variety of purported hangover cures. Raw eggs, long runs, and black coffee: it’s all in here. What worked and what didn’t? We put our livers on the line to get to the truth. Black Coffee, Nicotine and a Cold Shower A Read more...