Horoscopes: Week 22

Posted 12:40pm Monday 11th September 2023 by Critic

Aquarius Jan 20 - Feb 18 Aquarius, learn what a fucking boundary is. You’ve been overstepping and it’s getting a little weird.  Food to hyperfixate on: Beans on toast. Pisces Feb 19 - Mar 20 It’s time to adopt a new form of conflict management and Read more...

Horoscopes: Week 17

Posted 1:54pm Monday 31st July 2023 by Critic

Aquarius Jan 20 - Feb 18 To get through the last few weeks of winter, treat yourself to your favourite comfort foods. Think ramen, mashed potatoes, pasta. All the carbs you can dream of. Make the most of hibernation, baby!  Habit to break: Picking your nose.  Pisces Feb 19 Read more...

Horoscopes: Week 14

Posted 1:33pm Sunday 9th July 2023 by Critic

Aquarius Jan 20 - Feb 18 Take a trip to Veggie Boys this week. Grocery prices are fucked, and you will probably need some nutrients after re-o. Leeks are good this time of year.  Re-O Activity: Take shrooms and have a spiritual awakening.  Pisces Feb 19 - Mar 20 Winter Read more...

Horoscopes: Week 12

Posted 4:16pm Sunday 21st May 2023 by Critic

Aquarius Jan 20 - Feb 18 Troubled waters ahead! Be sure to navigate your friendships and relationships accordingly, as tension is on the horizon. Also, wash your sheets. It’s been way too long. Kiwi tune to play: ‘Something In The Water’ by Brooke Fraser Pisces Feb Read more...

Horoscopes: Week 11

Posted 3:39pm Sunday 14th May 2023 by Critic

Aquarius Jan 20 - Feb 18 Aquarius, it’s easy to feel alone in this world. But don’t worry. A new, special someone is on the horizon for you. Don’t give up on love and comfort, it’s just around the corner. Snack of the week: Spring rolls.  Pisces Feb 19 - Read more...

Horoscopes: Week 9

Posted 4:20pm Sunday 30th April 2023 by Critic

  Aquarius Jan 20 - Feb 18 Aquarius, it’s time to wake up. Someone in your close circle may be up to no good, so it’s time to reevaluate who is in your nearest and dearest posse. Bar to visit: Woof!  Pisces Feb 19 - Mar 20 And first of all, I wanna Read more...

Horoscopes: Week 8

Posted 2:16pm Sunday 23rd April 2023 by Critic

Aquarius Jan 20 - Feb 18 It’s time to celebrate yourself, Aquarians! Give yourself a sweet treat and a pat on the back for all your efforts. You deserve it. Political ideology to subscribe to: Anarchism.  Pisces Feb 19 - Mar 20 Pisces, it goes without saying you have Read more...

Horoscopes: Week 18

Posted 8:01pm Friday 5th August 2022 by Critic

Aquarius Jan 20 - Feb 18 Feeling depressed? Yeah, aren’t we all. Take some self-care time this week, and really reflect on your emotional wellbeing and relationships.  Holiday to book: Bali.    Pisces Feb 19 - Mar 20 Pisces have such an interesting way of Read more...

Horoscopes: Week 15

Posted 5:18pm Sunday 17th July 2022 by Critic

Aquarius Jan 20 - Feb 18 Your lust and love for life is admirable, but remember: sometimes shit is rough. Not everything can be fun all the time, and sometimes you have to do the hard yards. Bad habit to break: being irresponsible with your finances.   Pisces Feb 19 - Mar Read more...

Horoscopes: Week 12

Posted 6:15pm Sunday 22nd May 2022 by Critic

Aquarius Jan 20 - Feb 18 Pencil some quality time into your schedule, Aquarians. You deserve to do something fun, wholesome and happy this week.  Snack craving: Twisties.   Pisces Feb 19 - Mar 20 Things have been emotionally heavy for you these past few weeks, but Read more...