Sources within the ODT have confirmed that Editor Barry Fitzbarry has spent the last week laughing at the moon and hosting debaucherous orgies in the ODT boardroom, assuming that because Critic has been dealing with international media attention (your time will come, ODT), we’d be too busy to catch their crimes against journalism. The joke’s on you, Fitzbarry. Justice doesn’t sleep.
ODT Watch also still searching…for love. Txt me: 0278221594
Is there a small, localised volcano around the vicinity of 52 Stuart Street? And if so, what rituals do we have to perform to make it erupt?
Our mole in the ODT, Deputy Puns Editor Barry O’Barrigan, leaked us the ODT’S biannual external review, excerpts of which appear below. 
Sweat poured down the face of the ODT’s Chief Financial Officer, Barry Barryson, as he shifted beads around his abacus as fast as his arthritic fingers allowed. “It’s a lot of shillings, Barry,” he said to the Editor, “but if you really think these ‘computers’ are worth it, we can start divesting. I’ll send a telegram to Baz in sales to take our cart and horse to market.”
We reproduce the conclusion to the ODT’s external review below, without comment.
