“It’s not like it’s not fuckin true, huhuh,” chuckled Chad Stuttfield, the 19-year-old behind @haileysims11, @jessica_blackkkk and @caseyrae_stevensen, three Instagram handles which responded to an online poll that “Yes”, they enjoyed receiving unsolicited pictures of shaven, half-erect male genitalia. “I mean, chicks aren’t gonna fuckin say that straight up they’re into it or whatever. Duh,” Stuttfield continued, puffing on an e-cigarette. “But it’s not like they don’t want the D. Ever heard of Freud? It’s called science, bitch.”

Posted 6:32pm Thursday 11th April 2019 by The Critical Tribune.
Tags: satire
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
FAKE NEWS
MORE COLUMNS
- Horoscopes: Issue 1 2026
- Editorial: An Obituary to $4 Lunch (2021-2025)
- Crossword Answers - Issue 1 2026
- Te Rōpū Māori – Māori Students Association
- OUSA Exec: Welcome Message
- Booze Review: Raspberry Hyoketsu
- Mi Goreng Graduate: Greek Traybake
- Booze Review: Jam Shed Shiraz
- Local Produce: Kesi.ink
- Editorial: Long Live Critic


