Aquarius

Jan 20 - Feb 18

Keep developing that character and nicotine addiction, bestie! 

Iso activity: becoming TikTok famous

 

Pisces

Feb 19 - Mar 20

Sure, being funny is cool and all but so is addressing your deep rooted trauma. Maybe it’s time to check in with your therapist. 

Iso activity: making bomb ass ramen

 

Aries

Mar 21 - Apr 19

There’s a difference between being straightforward and aggressive. Learn the difference ASAP before your flatmates hate you. 

Iso activity: self-help

 

Taurus

Apr 20 - May 20

Autumn is nearly here! It’s the perfect time to be a Taurus. ’Tis the season for reading, sleeping, drinking coffee, and complaining! 

Iso activity: finish reading Dune, re-read Harry Potter, or at least break out the crosswords. 

 

Gemini

May 21 - Jun 20

Go you, always doing the most for all your pals. Just make sure you are getting the time and energy out of the relationships that you invest in. 2022 is the year of self worth baby!

Iso activity: social media cleanse  

 

Cancer

Jun 21 - July 22

Cancer men get shit on a lot. We need to stop the slander. If you’re a Cancer man, go you. Treat yourself. Buy that new video game or whatever.

Iso activity: online shopping

 

Leo

July - Aug 22

This year's stars predict lots of lovers in your future. Just make sure you get tested for Covid and STD’s, imagine having both at the same time! 

Iso activity: refining your Tinder profile, filtering your matches 

 

Virgo

Aug 23 - Sep 22

It takes everything in you to not voice your judgemental opinions on the daily. However, there are perhaps some people in your life who need to hear the tough love. 

Iso activity: plotting revenge on those who have wronged you 

 

Libra

Sep 23 - Oct 22

Libra, I am constantly unsure of what to make of you. But one thing’s for sure, you’re annoying as fuck on the piss. Take a chill pill and say less.

Iso activity: wine tasting

 

Scorpio

Oct 23 - Nov 21

They say Scorpios can be intense and possessive! And they’re right. Please calm down and take a deep breath. 

Iso activity: working on your anger issues 

 

Sagittarius

Nov 22 - Dec 21

Despite what a Sag believes, it’s possible to voice your opinion in a way that doesn’t come across as condescending to others. 

Iso activity: reflect on the phrase “think before you speak”

 

Capricorn

Dec 22 - Jan 19

There is a reason your symbol is the goat. It’s because you are the GOAT! Also you need to shave.

Iso activity: starting a political activism page