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OUSA no longer has a stake in Unipol, after selling the last of its shares to the University last week. OUSA will be paid $296,000 for its shares, and receive a settlement return of $370,000 from a loan dating back to the 1980s, putting the total amount that OUSA will receive at $666k. When Critic asked about the “number of the beast” being associated with the sale of students’ beloved gym, OUSA representative Lucie Farr assured us it was “entirely coincidental.”

OUSA originally owned a 40% share in the gym before it was relocated to the University Plaza this year; 40% of the remainder was owned by the University and 20% by the Polytech. With the Polytech giving up its 20% share to the University in exchange for a twenty-year access agreement for Polytech students, the University now owns Unipol outright.

When asked whether this would result in the gym becoming less centred on the needs of students, OUSA President Logan Edgar claimed, “Unipol is the prime example of a student-focused service run by the University.” Edgar expressed confidence that Unipol’s Governance Body has students’ needs at heart, citing the example of Unipol management refusing to allow the All Blacks to book space at the gym when it would have limited the space of students attempting to work out. “The OUSA Executive does not believe it needs to be on the governance body for Unipol to represent students if issues should come up,” Edgar said.

In its press release OUSA claimed that the University remains committed to keeping Unipol free of charge for students. However in the future there will be nothing stopping the University from charging students for access, so these may be empty words.

The sale was prompted by the gym’s new facilities at the Plaza, which required a major increase in capital. This would have meant a $1 million commitment by OUSA, and a diluted shareholding from 40% to less than 20%. OUSA claims that the most likely scenario was a dilution of shareholding to the point where the University held sufficient shares to make votes cast by OUSA irrelevant. In light of this, OUSA opted for the 666 grand. The association is yet to determine what the money will be used for and has no pressing plans to do so. Critic has developed a wishlist that may help OUSA in its decision:

01 A full-colour student magazine for scarfies to enjoy.

02 Private jet hire to allow Critic staff to commute from Waiheke Island.

03 A personal assistant to allow Critic editor Stockman to cut back to 60-hour weeks, and enjoy his retirement.

04 A catapult. A really big one. Just because.