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First this week, let’s go to the tattooed and violent rugby desk, and didn’t those Highlanders do everyone a solid favour by going to Durban and giving the table-topping Sharks a thrashing? Yes they did, because no one likes to see too big a gap at the top. The boys put in a huge shift on defence, restricting the Sharks to scoring from penalty goals, which must have been so boring for their supporters to watch. At least they got to see some decent attack with the ‘Landers scoring four tries for a rare bonus point win. Number 10 Lima Sopoaga has been kicking the goals and has generally improved, which is encouraging to see as we have been struggling in that position for years. This result was a bit of a surprise and most people (myself included) weren’t holding out much hope for a positive result here. The Stormers are up next on their African adventure and they are rooted to the bottom of the table after only two wins in a difficult start to their campaign. The Highlanders have a good chance to come back from their trip with a bigger than expected haul of points.

The Chiefs are having a few problems, while the Hurricanes are experiencing a resurgence. Even the Blues, with a win over the Crusaders and ditching Benji, seem to have gotten back on track. The New Zealand conference is looking very competitive and very hard to predict. I have ranted about this before, but compared to the South Africans – who have four of their five teams in the bottom five while the Sharks are in the lead – I think this points to the fact that New Zealand has its resources and best players spread over their five teams, whereas the other unions seem to be putting all their eggs in one or two baskets. And, yet, South Africa is still moaning about “deserving” a sixth team. Bitch, please ...

While all the Super Rugby players are focused on their franchise’s season at the moment, in June the season will break for a few weeks so the All Blacks can play three pointless matches against England, not saying no to beersies, in the Steinlager Series. Over in South Africa the Boks host Wales and Scotland for the equally boozy Castle Lager Series, while Australia play a three-game Castrol Edge Tour against France. Really? I suppose the beer sponsorship makes sense, but what the fuck does motor oil have to do with rugby? I don’t think we are going to take a few whiffs of Castrol before a game ...

Seeing that we disrupt the Super Rugby season for these pointless (but lucrative) games, indulge me for a while. I have been wondering for quite a bit, ignoring obvious financial motivations, is there any point to these corporate circle-jerk series and one-off reach-around tests? Looking at the bigger picture, is there a more compelling way to do things that would excite fans and help develop the game? A similar question has been asked by football fans, and UEFA, the administrators of European football, have come up with an interesting alternative to their meaningless international friendly matches with the proposed UEFA Nations League, which is set to start after the 2018 World Cup.

The plan, which is still being finalised, would see the 54 member countries of UEFA being divided into four divisions and would have relegation and promotion coming in to play between the divisions as the competition progresses. The games would replace most international friendly matches but will not conflict with qualification for the top tier tournaments like the World Cup and the European Championships. However, there is a chance that the Nations League may eventually offer a second chance to qualify for the European Championship, which is being revamped to a multi-country tournament in 2020 after France hosts in 2016, which will be the first running since the expansion to include 24 teams. Some of the eight extra places could be decided via the Nations League, which adds a further incentive to do well. The initial concept of the UEFA Nations League has been very well received by fans, players and pundits and was unanimously adopted by the 54 UEFA member associations at their 38th UEFA Congress held recently in Turkey. Some people are accusing the Europeans of trying to steal the spotlight from the World Cup, as the Cup will be played less in Europe going forward as FIFA is expanding into new territories, with Russia and Qatar lined up as the next hosts.

I think the Nations League is a good idea as it will give the less attractive smaller nations a chance to face some of the top ranked teams that would be otherwise unwilling to schedule a friendly match with them. Also the potential to qualify for other tournaments, and the added element of “promotion/relegation,” will give those smaller teams something to fight for, even if it is not the big prize of being champions or qualifying for the Euros. I am not sure how this could be translated over to rugby but the fact that there is a bigger prize at stake than winning just another random game or series gives more meaning to the games.

The poorly named and predictable “(insert bullshit sponsor) Rugby Championship” has failed to live up to the hype in my opinion. Ok, it was a little bit exciting last year, but really the All Blacks have been too dominant, Argentina are rubbish and we have seen the All Blacks play Australia and South Africa millions of times already. We should have included Japan and some Pacific Island nations to really promote the game in the Pacific region, like the Nations League will do for football in Europe. I don’t think the “Who can finish second to the All Blacks” Rugby Championship has evolved into something to rival the exciting Six Nations competition, which remains close and unpredictable with four different winners in the last five years. This year’s tournament saw Ireland winning their 12th title and captain Brian O’Driscoll retiring after racking up a world record 141 international caps, including eight on tour with the British and Irish Lions. An amazing achievement in an amazing career but he still never managed to taste a victory over the All Blacks. Somehow I feel we get the last laugh.