Report: Most Snapchat Groups Are Just Hungover Dudes Talking About How Hungover They Are

Posted 5:39pm Saturday 7th April 2018

According to figures released by Snap Inc, upwards of 80% of male Snapchat group conversations are just dudes lying in bed dying of alcohol poisoning the night after they all got drunk together. Among the most common captions were “one massive pile of dust,” “fuck that was a big Read more...

Bosch, 3M in Bidding War to be Official Sandpaper Sponsor of Australian Cricket Team

Posted 4:45pm Wednesday 28th March 2018

Industrial Sandpaper companies Bosch and 3M are reportedly in a heated bidding war over the coveted sandpaper sponsorship rights for the Australian cricket team.  While in recent years the sandpaper supplier has been considered a low-level sponsorship deal, the deal is considered Read more...

Impoverished man convinces self that he actually doesn’t mind the taste of Double Brown

Posted 12:39pm Wednesday 28th March 2018

Commerce student Dan Marlow totally reckons he actually likes the taste of notoriously cheap and nasty beer Double Brown. “Yeah it’s pretty good, honestly. Goes down a treat if it’s super cold. Tastes the same as pretty much any other beer.” When asked what inspired his Read more...

For a Building, UniPol Is Looking Super Judgy Right Now

Posted 12:28pm Wednesday 28th March 2018

Man, UniPol is totally looking like an asshole right now. Shut your stupid face, you dumb building. I don’t even care, it’s just a pizza. OK, it’s like the third straight day I’ve had pizza. And this is three straight nights of drinking. Still, I’m an adult. Shut up, Read more...

Man Left Embarrassed After Yet Again Failing to Find the Vagina

Posted 12:27pm Wednesday 28th March 2018

“Up a bit, no, too high. Fuck it, I’ll put it in myself then,” a Dunedin man’s partner was overheard loudly exclaiming during one of their bi-monthly hanky-panky sessions. The man, whose meaty highlighter reportedly shrunk to a chewed pencil stub with shame, told the Read more...

Mature Student Has an Interesting Life Story to Share With All 200 People in Lecture

Posted 12:24pm Wednesday 28th March 2018

The entire class of LAWS101 considered themselves lucky on Tuesday, after mature student Edith van Borkel treated them all to a fascinating and highly informative tale about her own life. Everyone was enthralled as she spent a full eight minutes describing her son’s brief encounter with the Read more...

Hilarious Lad Comments “Is This the One You Told Us About?” On Mate’s New Facebook Friendship

Posted 12:22pm Wednesday 28th March 2018

Part-time surveying student and full-time hilarious memelord Connor Mannering absolutely stitched up his mate with a gag you’d never see coming! After friend Tom York was added by local girl Moira June, Mannering swooped into the comments, implying that York had been sexually interested in Read more...

Why I quit sex

Posted 11:38am Sunday 10th September 2017

Everyone loves a good sex story. I seem to have a lot of them. Ever since I lost my virginity at 17, I’ve had a complicated relationship with sex. The complication is that I have a shitload of sex. A different guy every night kinda sex. A threesome with a stripper kind of sex. four people in Read more...