The OUSA referendum is coming up. Referendums are essentially one of the biggest ways students can influence the policies and stance of OUSA. Not that any of you noticed, but a couple weeks ago the OUSA exec were inviting students to submit questions that will be put to the student body on May 27th to vote on. Y’all really fumbled the bag on this one; you could have submitted literally anything – subject to OUSA’s lawyers who have a bit of a reputation for being boring, mind you.
In 2019, the Critic editor Charlie submitted “silly” questions. My personal favourites include whether OUSA should de-establish the medical students’ society “because they’re getting uppity”, and that OUSA change their logo to a “big old dick”. Inspired by my forefathers, I asked arguably the most important question on this year’s referendum (beyond whether OUSA should provide cheap dinners like $4 lunch or lobby for gender neutral bathrooms): “Should OUSA make free prints of Sexy Garfield available for all students?”
I’ve had Sexy Garfield on the brain for years. Taking advantage of my newfound exec meeting speaking rights, I bring her up at every chance I get. Self-professed Sexy Garfield hater Debbie loves it. For those who don’t know her (because I forget that at the ripe age of 22 I’m Dunedin Old and content cycles faster than my washing machine on spin), here’s a bit of lore behind the beautiful beast herself.
‘Lasagnerie’ is a portrait of cartoon cat Garfield wearing pink lingerie, stockings, and high heels. The sultry work of art by a former student Emily Davidson was originally a centrefold of Critic and a part of the OUSA Student Art Exhibition in 2017. It was bought by President Hugh Baird and framed (103cm x 78cm) for $250 and hung in OUSA Secretary Donna Jones’ office as a practical joke. “A fucking waste of money,” said 2018 President Caitlin Barlow-Groome. I beg to differ.
The magnificent portrait has had many homes since then, with her legend taking on a life of its own. A student flat in 2018 admitted to Critic that they snagged 140 copies of the issue with her as the centrefold, sending photos of them posing next to their beloved Sexy Garfield wall that they pranked their flatmate with while he was out for football. “We eventually had to take them down because he got night terrors,” the flat told Critic.
The framed portrait of Sexy Garfield lived in Critic for a while. I was incredibly upset when she was moved. Debbie was also upset – she wanted to have nothing to do with the sultry feline who then was the subject of OUSA exec meeting debates. They couldn’t decide where she should go. As an expensive piece of art, she needed to be somewhere where the public could admire her. Critic was apparently not the place for this. People are genuinely scared to come into the office (Lotto bites).
After much debate (and groans of frustration from Debbie) ‘Lasagnerie’ now proudly resides in the OUSA main reception where you collected your Ori and Hyde tickets (also where you can find lost property, if you didn’t already know). She’s not immediately obvious when you walk in – Debbie didn’t want important guests to be confronted with her glory.
Anyway, if the OUSA lawyers don’t fuck this one up for me, you’ll get the chance to vote for free prints of Sexy Garfield to be made available for all students. For now, you’ll have to make do with the extra centrefold in this week’s issue of her. You’re welcome!