Daisy
I always was surprised that these blind dates never accidentally put two people who knew each other together. It would always be the case that it happened to me. We were both debaters.I had never really found the guy interesting or attractive in the least bit – he always pissed me off when he turned up to things I was at and acted all knowing and patronising. However, gritting my teeth, I decided to give it a go, relying heavily on the provided wine.
Naturally at the dinner we ended up discussing debating and the upcoming Australs long into the night. And sorry, Critic, but the general consensus we came to was that you suck.
To be fair, the dinner date was actually okay, but I was reasonably bored so it was a welcome “coincidence” to run into the friends I had messaged to rescue me after dinner. I started saying goodbye to my date, but to my horror he acted like he knew my friends, and clung on as we went to buy some drinks in town somewhere.
I really, really just wanted to have some fun, but my date stuck to me like glue and several times gave me a patronising hug/squeeze around the shoulders and asked if we should head off soon to “continue our date.” I gave him my best “get your arm off me” eyes each time, which he clearly took to mean “just a little bit longer.” By about 10pm he had clearly decided to take matters into his own hands. Giving me the same squeeze, he announced, “it was nice seeing you guys but we must be off.”
I replied that I was keen to stay with my friends, so with little to do to save face he had to leave by himself, telling me as he left to text him when I got home so he’d know I was safe. For the record, I didn’t.
Thanks, Critic, for the really average night.
Donald
Awkwardly, I vaguely knew my date (we share mutual interests) and had always found her kind of attractive. I could tell she had a huge crush on me, and just the other day I had actually told my friend in Sydney that yeah, I would probably bang her; it would be doing her a favour. Very early on I figured that tonight may as well be the night – she was clearly lonely – so I texted my flatmates in advance and told them not to be dicks about it.We both knew how to handle alcohol, so as we passed that liquor store opposite The Bog we ducked in and I bought us two more matching bottles of wine, just like a true gentleman. The strategy was well practiced and genius: she would drink the Critic-supplied bottles one at a time, hiding one under the table and switching later on, and I would drink the two I had bought using the same strategy. It was only half way through the date that we realised Critic was paying and the corkage fee wasn’t really a problem, which gave us some good laughs at our deeply engrained cheapness.
Conversation was great; we talked about everything from debating to the cool gigs we both happened to go to. Dinner was good too – we decided to go to a place we had often gone for debating BYOs.
We started walking towards the Octagon after dinner and ran into some friends. We decided to hang out with them for a while which was cool – they’re all really nice people, but they’re just kind of lost and not really going anywhere. Anyway, I’m quite popular with them – I think it’s because I’m successful – and we all had a great time chatting, drinking and smoking things down by the railway station. They’re a crazy bunch but I like to think I can keep my own.
I was quite tired by the early hours and decided to head home. No luck for my date tonight, but I’m sure we’ll see each other again soon.