In a stunning and unexpected U-turn hailed as a new dawn for inter-island relations, a North Islander tried a cheese roll and understood just why South Islanders love it so much.
James, who was born and bred in Palmerston North, has been a student at Otago for the last four years. Despite multiple opportunities, he only first tasted southern sushi last Saturday, after being pestered while walking past a school fundraising stand.
“I’d thought all these years that it was just a half-arsed cheese toastie with Maggi onion soup powder in it,” says James. “And I guess that’s what it is, but there’s just something about how it all comes together. It’s absolutely life-changing.”
He’s tried to replicate the recipe in his flat, he says, but despite trying his best to get authentic ingredients, including walking 45 minutes to get a white loaf from Couplands, but said “it just doesn’t work. I guess it takes practice to do it the authentic way. I’ll have to ask my mate how she does it. She’ll know, she’s from Balclutha.”
At press time, James was hard at work introducing his mate to Palmerston North’s finest culinary export: chlamydia.