Archive
Kava: From Root to Ritual
Posted 12:38pm Sunday 21st March 2021 by Susana Jones
Kava, yaqona, ‘ava, ‘awa, malok, grog. My earliest memory of this sacred substance was when I was about 10 years old, sitting cross-legged on the floor covered in woven mats in my childhood home. Family surrounded me while my uncle squeezed the brown out of the powdered root and into the Read more...
Best Places to Skate in Dunedin
Posted 2:42pm Sunday 14th March 2021 by Jay Bailey
In the glory of an empty, level-four-lockdown Dunedin, I finally faced my fears and learned how to ride a skateboard. Learning to skate at nineteen years of age may not impress some, but after years of desire, envy, fear, and trepidation, I was thrilled to cruise around the old Coupland’s car Read more...
Fuck, I Can’t Cook!
Posted 2:23pm Sunday 14th March 2021 by Alice Taylor
This recipe for Pad Thai hits my craving for noodles when I simply don’t have the means to spend on my dearest, Thai Hanoi. I shamelessly use Wattie’s Pad Thai sauce because I am poor and lazy and the sauce is delicious. Serves 3 250g rice noodles 2 eggs 1 onion 4 spring Read more...
Why the Pisces Moon Might Be Fucking With You
Posted 1:49pm Sunday 14th March 2021 by Sophia Carter Peters
These past few weeks we have been experiencing a Pisces moon. For those unfamiliar with astrology, Pisces (Feb 19 – March 20) is a sign commonly associated with empathy, impressionability, white wine, creativity, and emotional fragility. Basically, they’re weak ass bitches. We knew Read more...
Which Uni Building Are You?
Posted 1:29pm Sunday 14th March 2021 by Elliot Weir
1. How old are you? a. A literal baby (1) b. A teenager (2) c. Early 20s Read more...
Jutland Studio/Spaceland: A New Dunedin Creative Renaissance
Posted 1:13pm Sunday 14th March 2021 by Sophia Carter Peters
The scene: Waterfront warehouse district, surrounded by big trucks, empty buildings, and corrugated iron everywhere. Enter a new resurgence of the local gig scene. A quiet, yellow corner building with high ceiling and some bizarre architecture is the setting for a rejuvenation of the Dunedin music Read more...
Local Produce: Zena Burgess, owner of Zen Blu Jewellery
Posted 12:24pm Sunday 14th March 2021 by Annabelle Vaughan
Zen Blu necklaces look like what would happen if you told a mermaid to pull apart some 70s jewellery and make it into something magical. The brightly coloured plastic beads sit alongside pearls, seashells and (presumably) enchanted symbols. On the Instagram page, the necklaces are edited onto a Read more...
Top 10 Ways to Trick Your Flatmates into Doing Shared Flat Meals
Posted 1:34am Sunday 14th March 2021 by Callan George
Just do it. Start cooking. Make a giant fuck off meal and serve it to the whole clan. Odds are, they’ll accept a free feed. Repeat this until your flatties feel as if they have to return the ‘favour’ and then boom, you’ve guilt tripped them a system of mutual Read more...
OPINION: Priority Should Be Given to Māori Students When it Comes to Teaching Te Reo
Posted 1:23am Sunday 14th March 2021 by Annabelle Vaughan
The use of te reo Māori has been revived over the past five years. Both non-Māori and Māori are now open to learning the language. However, with this spike in popularity comes the need for the appropriate resources and infrastructure to ensure that anybody who wishes to learn te reo Read more...
Are Mullets Sexy? The Castle Street Perspective
Posted 1:18am Sunday 14th March 2021 by Asia Martusia King
Mullets have a long history. The world’s first mullet was depicted on a metal deity figurine unearthed in an English car park, dating back to 1st-century AD (After Drip). Roman warriors with mullets were engineered for battle, their hair styled out of their eyes and difficult to grab. Murder Read more...
Job Searching, Now With a Side of Mental Health Support
Posted 12:27am Sunday 7th March 2021 by Susana Jones
If you’ve ever been a student searching for a job, you’ve definitely heard of Student Job Search (SJS). If you’re funded by a Daddy and have never been on that job search grind, SJS is a charity, underwritten by MSD and the student unions, that hooks students up with job Read more...
Where Did the Word “Breather” Come From?
Posted 11:33pm Saturday 6th March 2021 by Oscar Paul
For years, Otago students were dubbed ‘scarfies’. The word was popularised by the eponymous 1999 film and came loaded with half-a-century of resentment from older generations. As ubiquitous as the ‘scarfie’ moniker once was, it has increasingly been replaced by a newer, more Read more...
What’s Wrong With Freshers?
Posted 10:56pm Saturday 6th March 2021 by Fox Meyer
We intercepted first-years on their way out of the Toga Party to ask a simple question: What is the biggest problem in your life right now? Three new friends all admitted that “coming from a solid group of friends back home, and starting anew” was really tough, but patted Read more...
Local Produce: Sometime Winner
Posted 10:35pm Saturday 6th March 2021 by Annabelle Vaughan
As the saying goes, you win some, you lose some. This mantra rings especially true for one of Dunedin’s newest up and coming acts, Sometime Winner. The five-piece line up consists of lead singer Louis (who dubs himself Kid Freeman on the Mic), guitarist Silas, violinist Rose, bassist Read more...
From the Parthenon to the Octagon
Posted 10:21pm Saturday 6th March 2021 by Elliot Weir
The first question Critic asked Sam, as we sat down for an interview in the sun, was how The Bacchae is pronounced. The answer, apparently, is ‘back-eye.’ The play is an ancient Athenian tragedy written by Euripedes, reimagined for a modern audience by a local team led by Read more...
What Coping Mechanism Are You?
Posted 11:23pm Tuesday 2nd March 2021 by Sophia Carter Peters
How long have you been in Dunedin? a. Less than 2 years Read more...
OG Lime vs. Lime Gen4 vs. Neuron
Posted 11:06pm Tuesday 2nd March 2021 by Alex Leckie-Zaharic
Gone are the simple days when Lime scooters ruled the streets. Scootering in Dunedin is no longer a one-horse race, with Neuron entering the fray in early January and forcing the humble Lime to upgrade, Incredibles-style, to compete. Critic’s self-proclaimed scooter expert took it upon himself Read more...
OPINION: Third Years Need to Stop Fucking Freshers
Posted 10:53pm Tuesday 2nd March 2021 by Sophia Carter Peters
CW: Sexual assault. The fact that you already know what I’m talking about tells me all I need to know. We all have that one skeevy friend who jokes about buying a fresher too many drinks at Catacombs or picking one up on Castle. Their comments are usually followed by a couple of sheepish Read more...
How to Pretend You Know Cricket
Posted 10:37pm Tuesday 2nd March 2021 by Elliot Weir
From deliveries to dismissals, dibbly-dobblers to golden ducks, cricket is an elaborate and perplexing way to waste your time. There are a lot of made-up words involved, like ‘inning’ and ‘wicket’ and ‘dilscoop.’ Aside from white men over the age of 50 and people Read more...
Who would win if the Rakaia Salmon and the Gore Giant Trout fought to the death?
Posted 9:56pm Tuesday 2nd March 2021 by Erin Gourley
In the centre of Gore stands a giant trout. On the outskirts of Rakaia stands a giant salmon. The fish are perched in the same pose — frozen in mid-air with cavernous maws agape. Separated by 452km of State Highway one, these twin titans of the South Island road trip are too far away to see Read more...
Moscato, Rosé, Moscato Rosé: Do They Taste the Same?
Posted 4:16pm Sunday 4th October 2020 by Kaiya Cherrington
Dessert wine, you gotta love her. Perfect for a cheeky necking before a night out, or something sweet you can sip while watching the hit movie ‘Bridesmaids’. Compared to other wines, dessert wine is particularly palatable and easy to drink. But rumour has it, they kind of taste the same Read more...
Dave From Maharajas
Posted 4:03pm Sunday 4th October 2020 by Fox Meyer
Some people say their hero is their mum. Some say Steve Irwin. Personally, I’d go with Dave from Maharajas. The dashing young manager is just as much a superhero as any of the rest. He upholds the law, serves the community, and doesn’t ask for anything in return. I’ve always been a Read more...
Local Produce: L Hotel
Posted 3:59pm Sunday 4th October 2020 by Fox Meyer
Up-and-coming band L Hotel, who formed a powerhouse threesome from previous band the Shitz, have recently been hitting Dunedin stages and blessing our ears with funky covers we all know and love. Critic caught up with bassist and ex-Radio 1 host Dave Borrie after a job interview. He did not get the Read more...
Hoarders: The Stories Behind Student Election Steals
Posted 3:58pm Sunday 4th October 2020 by Annabelle Vaughan
It’s the most wonderful, most polarizing time of 2020. Election season. Every three years, election hoardings from different political parties pop up around Dunedin, displaying the politicians vying for your vote (which you should definitely cast). But North Dunedin is probably not the best Read more...
How to Hypothetically Chuck a Hāngi Pit in Your Flat Yard
Posted 3:56pm Sunday 4th October 2020 by Kaiya Cherrington
Hāngi is iconic; the food that connects us to our ancestors, the best treat for all. Most importantly, forget your expensive, overhyped ham - Hāngi is the best Christmas dish, prove me wrong. Hāngi, as we all know, takes a huge amount of work. You have to dig a hole, find the Read more...
‘Better Than a Funeral’: Balancing Being a Good Flatmate and Looking After Yourself
Posted 9:47pm Thursday 24th September 2020 by Sophia Carter Peters
CW: Mental illness and suicide Moving into a hall or your first flat is insanely cool, especially moving in with friends who you know will make your year an absolute liability, but an amazing experience. Binge drinking on a Tuesday night with morning classes the next day and maccas runs at 3 am Read more...
Theia: Bringing Old School Wisdom into the Modern World
Posted 4:23pm Sunday 13th September 2020 by Sophia Carter Peters
Christchurch-born artist Theia (or Em-Haley Walker when she’s not on stage) has shaken up Kiwi pop as we know it with her own unapologetic spin to the genre. Nestled in her certified bangers is a softer, more personal touch, soon to have a space of its very own. Between stacking up songwriting Read more...
Participating in Mahuru Māori but my reo isn’t good
Posted 3:59pm Sunday 13th September 2020 by Kaiya Cherrington
Mahuru Māori is the annual challenge set to everyone in the effort to normalise and integrate Māori language into everyday lives. The challenge, set by Paraone Gloyne of Te Wānanga o Aotearoa in 2014, has grown immensely. In the first year, only three people participated, but in 2019 Read more...
IT'S NOT THAT DEEP - stick n pokes, a guide
Posted 10:30pm Thursday 10th September 2020 by Kate Yule
Stick and pokes are nothing new. Egyptians were doing it thousands of years ago, however recently it seems a bunch of bored students are too. Whether it's Caitlin who wants to spice up her personality by getting a lightning bolt tattooed on her finger, or your local breather with his nickname Read more...
Local Produce: Hannah Martin
Posted 10:28pm Thursday 10th September 2020 by Sinead Gill
Hannah Martin isn’t a Dunedin local, but Critic is officially claiming her as one of Dunedin and Studentville’s best emerging artists. She submitted her piece, “The Creation of Dunners”, to the OUSA Art Exhibition, and describes that piece like she does her other work: Read more...
Local Produce | Adelaide Cara
Posted 9:48pm Thursday 3rd September 2020 by Sophia Carter Peters
Radio One’s soundwave angel Adelaide Cara is bringing a darker sound to the Dunedin music scene. As a local producer and the vocalist of Milpool, they are a force to be reckoned with. They plan on leaving a supernatural mark on music – their instrumentals can only be described as Read more...
Bargain Box: Is It Worth It?
Posted 9:47pm Thursday 3rd September 2020 by Kaiya Cherrington
Trying to plan and decide what to eat for dinner takes up too much time in the day. Time that could be better-spent binge-watching Netflix shows with your flatmates and avoiding pending assignments. If you’re anything like me, eating like a rat is what gets us through the day. It’s not Read more...
Zodiac Records: South D’s Best Kept Secret
Posted 9:09pm Thursday 27th August 2020 by Tyler West
Walking down King Edwards Street in South Dunedin you pass bustling cafes, second-hand stores, and various offices. Standing out is a storefront full to bursting with books and music. “BOOK EXCHANGE” reads one side in bright yellow, “Zodiac RECORDS” reads the other. I spent Read more...
Things to Do and See In and Around Dunedin (if it’s 1980).
Posted 9:08pm Thursday 27th August 2020 by Asia Martusia King
One day in a secondhand bookshop, I unearthed an ancient tome from the year 1980. Blowing a thick layer of dust from the cover, I could make out the words Discovering Dunedin: 503 things to see and do in and around Dunedin. Written by Joyce Herd and accompanied with photos by the delightfully named Read more...
An Exclusive Interview with @sinksofdunedin
Posted 8:57pm Thursday 27th August 2020 by Naomii Seah
@sinksofdunedin, a novelty Instagram account for documenting and rating various sinks around Dunedin, has experienced a meteoric rise to fame since they created their account in late June. Currently, they have over 1000 followers, and 70 posts. On their account, they post glossy, well composed Read more...
The Dunedin Ice Stadium: The Hottest Coldest Place in Town
Posted 8:52pm Thursday 27th August 2020 by Fox Meyer
When I was deciding where to go to uni, I googled ‘best ice rink in NZ’. Apparently it’s in Dunedin, so now I’m in Dunedin too. Our rink offers ice disco nights, quiet midday sessions, live hockey, skating lessons and curling, all with a beach on the doorstep Somebody once Read more...
Local Produce: Jonte
Posted 8:51pm Thursday 27th August 2020 by Andy Randell
Back in high school and my first few years of varsity, I really wanted to be in one of those bands that would play gigs every other Saturday and pull in hundreds of people every time. So, I started one. We would practise every weekend, but it never amounted to anything, even though we played for Read more...
Mark Neilson: Acting Out Campus Security
Posted 8:39pm Thursday 27th August 2020 by Jack Gilmore
Actor and campus watchman Mark Neilson was told by Otago Uni “don’t come back” when he was a student here in the 90s. Yet, as time moved on, Mark has returned a couple of times. Firstly, through OUSA’s Social Activities department in the early 2000s, and again in 2018 as a Read more...
A Brief History of the Toitū Otago Settlers Museum
Posted 8:12pm Thursday 27th August 2020 by Kaiya Cherrington
The Otago Settlers Museum is New Zealand’s oldest history museum, and it’s hard to miss. The Museum spans across a huge portion of land from the Train Station to the Chinese Gardens, and the Museum itself was established to reflect colonial settlement. Starting off as the Otago Early Read more...
Wooosh! Wind Tunnels: Where, Why, What?
Posted 8:09pm Thursday 13th August 2020 by Zoe Humprey
It’s a Monday morning, you’re walking to class and for once you’ve woken up early enough to actually make an effort. Your hair is styled, your clothes are at least a step above sweatpants and that mild sense of organisation has lulled you into a feeling of confidence— when Read more...
Cody’s, Diesel, and Mavs: Do They Taste the Same?
Posted 8:04pm Thursday 13th August 2020 by Kaiya Cherrington
Word on the street is that, when it comes down to it, three bourbon and colas don’t taste any different. Cody’s, Diesel and Billy Mavericks, popular choices from rugby boys and bogans alike, are rumoured to have no distinguishing taste differences that set them apart from one Read more...
A Legacy Bids Farewell: the Churro Connoisseurs Leaving to Sail Around the World
Posted 7:58pm Thursday 13th August 2020 by Caroline Moratti
Eight years ago, Dunedin was different, and by different I mean objectively worse. Today it’s a (vaguely) bustling town of fusion cuisines, pokey cafes and various delicacies, but back then, the only food trucks were TexOtago and the Bacon Buttie Station. Even then the concept of travelling Read more...
Juno Is
Posted 7:54pm Thursday 13th August 2020 by Sophia Carter Peters
Dunedin-born, Mackenzie Hollebon (Mac), the mind behind Juno Is, has been in the gig scene for a while now. She initially emerged as the drummer for ‘Lacuna’ before pursuing a solo career - after some growing pains, she is thriving. “It was a really good transition into having full Read more...
Deconstructing Bisexuality
Posted 7:54pm Thursday 13th August 2020 by Naomii Seah
What do Shego, Velma and Kiera Knightly in Pirates of the Caribbean have in common? They’re all female characters I had a crush on in childhood. I’ve always known I was attracted to women. Conversely, I’d always been attracted to men. For most of my life I’d been happy Read more...
Tasting the Rainbow: An investigation into which coloured alcohol fucks you up the most
Posted 9:53pm Thursday 6th August 2020 by Annabelle Vaughan
Picking out a weekend beverage can be stressful, but there is generally one common consideration: alcohol content versus cost. But there is a danger in living life that way - not all alcohol is created equal, and people swear that different types will affect them in different ways. Where one drink Read more...
Local Produce | Neive Strang
Posted 9:51pm Thursday 6th August 2020 by Caroline Moratti
Writing about music can be hard sometimes, much like a perfume commercial - how do you convey a sound, a smell, a sense? But to me, listening to Neive Strang is the same sensation as the first sizzle of onions in a pan. It’s delicious, intoxicating and it’s only the beginning. The Read more...
Alcohol Intervention
Posted 9:49pm Thursday 6th August 2020 by Naomii Seah
“Alcohol in Aotearoa is super prevalent in all our social activities and our lifestyle. When you want to celebrate a good day, you sink some piss; if you want to get over a bad day, you sink some piss; if you’re bored, you sink some piss. That social behaviour around drinking is Read more...
Let Them Eat Cabbage: The Wheres, Whats and Hows of Community Gardens Near Campus
Posted 8:25pm Thursday 30th July 2020 by Sophia Carter Peters
No one ever told me how much admin making food would be. I miss the years of meals just manifesting before me three times a day. Now it’s up to ME to find fresh produce and limit my hot chip intake. Fortunately, hunting and gathering for yourself three times a day isn’t nail-pullingly Read more...
It’s Time to Duel: Meet Dunedin’s Tabletop Tycoon
Posted 2:35pm Thursday 30th July 2020 by Oscar Paul
Gregory Mansfield probably came out of the womb wearing a DuelDisk on his arm and Exodia in hand. At an older age, Gregory and his mates got back into YuGiOh! and all of its nostalgic glory. They were hooked on watching card unboxing videos, making their own decks and competing in and judging local Read more...
Curing the Common Cold
Posted 1:07pm Sunday 26th July 2020 by Naomii Seah
I’m sitting in my room with a friend, having a perfectly pleasant and innocuous conversation when I feel it. The little tickle in my throat. The wind in my windpipe. There’s a little moment where I think it won’t happen, and then it does: a sneeze, a cough, another sneeze and a Read more...
CRIME? Gay Paradise Ducks Relocated from Campus
Posted 1:04pm Sunday 19th July 2020 by Erin Gourley
Disclaimer: Please do not harass anyone mentioned in this story. Everyone is just doing what they think is best for the boys. Bill and Bill, the iconic gay paradise ducks that liked (PAST TENSE) to chill out on Union Lawn, were controversially uplifted and relocated by Bird Rescue Dunedin after Read more...
How to Tell if Your Flat is Haunted
Posted 10:32pm Thursday 16th July 2020 by Sophia Carter Peters
Ah, Dunedin houses. Since most of the houses in Studentville are a little (a lot) old, the usual quirks of ancient houses are common, slanted floors, water stains, and of course, ghosts. Not all ghosts are mean and dramatic, some are merely vibing on the astral plane and sometimes stir up some funky Read more...
The Great Critic Garlic Bread Review
Posted 7:49pm Thursday 16th July 2020 by Henessey Griffiths
Garlic bread has to be one of the most humbling foods out there. On the outside it is but a simple meal of garlic butter and toasted bread. Yet, any garlic bread fan understands that there is much complexity to the dish. The pungent sting of garlic, coddled with the smooth undertones of butter, Read more...
The Tale of Two TJs: The Otago Student Living the Best of Both Worlds.
Posted 2:26pm Sunday 12th July 2020 by Annabelle Vaughan
TJ Zee, better known by his stage name “ZExII” is one of Dunedin’s best emerging music acts, and is also just a generally cool guy. A Physiotherapy student by day, and a performer by night, one could even go as far to say that he is Dunedin’s very own Hannah Montana. Who, in Read more...
A White Woman With Bangs Tells You Which Planets Are Making You Sad
Posted 12:59pm Sunday 12th July 2020 by Sophia Carter Peters
Astrology is like a personality test, but cosmic and mean. In the stars lies a horribly accurate character analysis chart that will expose your flaws and potentially make you reevaluate your past relationships. You haven’t lived until you have your ass handed to you by the fucking planets. As Read more...
Tired of Tinder: A Return to The Dating Websites of Our Forefathers
Posted 12:47pm Sunday 12th July 2020 by Naomii Seah
It’s 2am, and I’m lying in bed swiping through Tinder for what feels like the 100th time this week. It’s post lockdown, and my rotation is getting a bit tight. At this point in my university career, it feels like I’ve gone through half the dating pool in Dunedin, and every Read more...
Poll: 91% of Otago Students Support Factory-Farming Kiwis on Stewart Island
Posted 3:26pm Sunday 5th July 2020 by Fox Meyer
Data doesn’t lie. More Otago students support factory-farming Kiwis on Stewart Island than legalising cannabis. These young patriots have a keen eye on creating a booming economy in the Southland/Rakiura area, with 100% responding that they’d support increasing jobs in the area. 100% Read more...
UniMart RTD Coffee Review
Posted 1:32am Friday 3rd July 2020 by Sinead Gill
Most people have never tried an RTD coffee (ready to drink. No, it doesn’t mean it is alcoholic), but you should. They are revolutionary. If I’d known they were a thing in first year, it might not have taken me five years to finish my degree. UniMart is full of them, and most of them are Read more...
Types of Sweater Boys
Posted 10:52pm Thursday 2nd July 2020 by Sophia Carter Peters
The classic David Bain sweater These boys are omnipresent in your Politics, English, or Anthropology lectures. They think the bags under their eyes from staying up til 4am looking at Reddit threads makes the interesting and different, but it actually just makes them look tired. They WILL ask Read more...
A-Z OF DUNEDIN ARTISTS
Posted 4:33pm Sunday 24th May 2020 by Critic
Adelaide Cara: Alternative Pop Bad Sav: Alternative Rock Captain Saturated Planet: Indie Rock Death and the Maiden: Alternative Rock Élan Vital: Dark Disco Flyspray: Post-Punk Gulls: Ambient Electronica Hot Donnas: Alternative Rock Iron Mammoth: Alternative Read more...
Don't do the 30 Day Squat Challenge
Posted 7:23pm Thursday 21st May 2020 by Kaiya Cherrington
Ever since Dame Queen Nicki Minaj’s music videos emerged, I think a piece of all of us dreamt of having an ass so fat, so bodacious, that we would cry in the shower while doing a mere 15 squats naked to achieve what she has. Or maybe that was just me. Drenched in sweat from the gym that I Read more...
Critic Reviews Mayor Aaron Hawkin's Critic Music Reviews
Posted 6:56pm Thursday 21st May 2020 by Henessey Griffiths
Aaron Hawkins: Mayor of Ōtepoti, antagonist of Dunedin News. Before his career in local government took off, Aaron was the Music Director and Breakfast Show Host for Radio One 91FM, and the Music Editor for Critic. 14 years later, it’s safe to say that Radio One and Critic now has a Read more...
Period Underwear: Worth it?
Posted 1:04am Friday 15th May 2020 by Andy Randell
Try something for me: what do you think of when I tell you to think of period products. You will have, no doubt, had tampons and pads spring to mind, maybe even the more recently popular moon cup, but how many of you thought of underwear itself? Probably very few of you did, unless you read the Read more...
Gender Diverse Takes On Periods
Posted 5:22pm Thursday 14th May 2020 by Sinead Gill
There is a lot of stigma around periods. Not as much stigma as there is around gender diversity, though. So what if you were stuck in the middle of both discourses? This would be a shit menstruation issue without talking to the one group of menstruators who are most excluded when it comes to period Read more...
PMDD: PMS’s Evil Twin
Posted 4:30pm Thursday 14th May 2020 by Sophia Carter Peters
Premenstrual Dysphoric Disorder, more commonly known as PMDD, is a disorder that affects 1 in 20 people with uteruses but is relatively unknown. The symptoms of PMDD are extensive and can cause serious disruptions in day to day life, that often require medication. What is PMDD? Well, most people Read more...
Colonisation Made Periods Gross
Posted 4:16pm Thursday 14th May 2020 by Kaiya Cherrington
Waiwhero, mate marama, mate wāhine, paheke, te awa atua. There are many ways to describe menstruation for Māori, because it is an important part of life. It is a sign of whakapapa, connection to the land, connection to the gods. Menstruation was power - until Read more...
How to Free Bleed
Posted 4:14pm Thursday 14th May 2020 by Naomii Seah
Periods are rough, messy, and miserable. Sanitary items are no better. Sometimes it’s just too much effort to find one, let alone buy them. Sometimes your flow is so light that a sanitary product just doesn’t seem worth it. Sometimes, you just need to free bleed. Here’s Read more...
How to Get $50 Worth From a Moon Cup When You Don’t Bleed Four Days a Month
Posted 4:01pm Thursday 14th May 2020 by Fox Meyer
Moon cups are great. They’re inconspicuous, reduce plastic waste, and they’re easily distributable to people with uteruses in developing nations. All my female friends were raving about them, and not one to miss out on the latest trend, I decided to invest and see what all the hype was Read more...
Fostering Animals: Yes or Yes?
Posted 4:59pm Monday 11th May 2020 by Sophia Carter Peters
It might sound obvious, but if you have a secure home and love animals, but don’t see yourself living in Dunedin forever, fostering is a great option. Fostering is a great way to get a cuddle fix while also socialising an animal so they are ready for a forever home. Depending on who you foster Read more...
UoO Hunger Games: Sims 4 Edition
Posted 2:57pm Monday 11th May 2020 by Critic
With (from left top:) Law Student, Girl Who Sleeps, Country Boy, A+ Student, Breatha, Thrifty Artsy Girl, and Jock Sims 4 has made a resurgence during the lockdown. With no social interaction and nothing to do; what else will kill five hours in the blink of an eye? Killing sims is a Read more...
How to Look After House Plants
Posted 2:51pm Monday 11th May 2020 by Asia Martusia King
Congratulations, you have a bouncing baby houseplant. Doesn’t it look divine amongst your fairy lights and polaroids? Here’s how to keep it big, strong and alive so that it can one day look after you in your old age. Light of my life, fire of my loins Different plants require Read more...
YOU SHOULD KNOW THE NAME ROBERT LAWSON.
Posted 4:48pm Sunday 10th May 2020 by Caroline Moratti
His name should be on your lips when you kiss your lover. There should be tattoos, monuments, babies, decorative gardens, all named in his honour. Robert Lawson carved the very fabric of Dunedin, sculpted our culture in his muscled hands. He designed the buildings you love, literally the only Read more...
How to Feng Shui Your Bedroom
Posted 4:20pm Sunday 10th May 2020 by Naomii Seah
Every culture has its own superstitions. You’ve probably heard some of these from your grandma, or your mother or father, or your auntie. For me, it’s always been Feng Shui. My dad touts it like no tomorrow, and whenever I tell him something that’s going wrong in my life, his Read more...
Eating My Backyard: Can Foraged Foods Make a Delicious Dinner?
Posted 3:58pm Sunday 10th May 2020 by Wyatt Ryder
I’ve always liked the idea of growing my own food, but I am a very lazy man. Last week, though, I had a realisation: I’m already growing food. If animals can eat weeds, why can’t I? I grew up rural, so I had a vague idea of what was out there in terms of edible weeds. I did a Read more...
Dunedin TradeMe for 10 Dollars or Under
Posted 4:16pm Thursday 7th May 2020 by Saskia Rushton-Green
Here’s some of what’s currently available on trademe in Dunedin for 10 dollars and under. 1. These sexy belly button rings 2. This 75g container of spreadable chicken 3. Wow These ARE a bit Cute Bead Read more...
How to Make a Bong out of Literally Anything
Posted 5:33pm Thursday 30th April 2020 by Naomii Seah
I wasn’t the cool kid in high school. I had a few close friends, and lots of classmates, but I didn’t have status. I went to maybe a few high school parties, usually as a plus one, and lots of tame birthdays. The rest of the time, I was studying. Maybe that’s why it took me until Read more...
Living Without Time
Posted 12:30pm Friday 24th April 2020 by Fox Meyer
I’ve been wanting to live without time for a while now. I’d heard about a petition by a Noweigin town called Sommarøy, north of the Arctic Circle, which called for the abolishment of the 24 hour clock. The campaign asked: “Why do we need time and clocks when there is no Read more...
Surviving Long Distance
Posted 12:10pm Friday 24th April 2020 by Henessey Griffiths
For almost all couples, going long distance is generally the last thing you want to do. Critic spoke to couples who moved in together for lockdown to avoid doing just that. But what if you weren’t ready, or able, to do that with your partner? Or what if your significant other is your best Read more...
How to Hide Your Vaping From Your Parents
Posted 11:36am Friday 24th April 2020 by Caroline Moratti
During your tender, sweet time at the University of Otago, it’s highly probable that you’ve picked up a nicotine addiction. Let’s face it, sometimes there are parties so shit that you just need to smoke/vape outside in order to avoid your 2nd cousin making ‘come fuck Read more...
Which Witch is Which?
Posted 10:55am Thursday 23rd April 2020 by Fox Meyer
Spiritualism always seems to be in style. It’s time Critic provided a guide for the most common types of modern witches. If any of this makes you rethink your beliefs, you’re probably a shit witch. The E-Witch Dresses in flowy, raggedy clothing that looks antique but was Read more...
The Scientist and Her Thirteen Ant Colonies
Posted 12:04pm Tuesday 21st April 2020 by Sophia Carter Peters
The transition to online classes has been difficult for many students. But what if your studies required access to labs and materials that you can’t recreate from home? What if, say, your research included looking after live creatures? Critic spoke to Eloise Lancaster, an ecology Masters Read more...
How to Spice Up Your Zoom Lectures
Posted 10:42am Tuesday 21st April 2020 by Kaiya Cherrington
It's been a few weeks now, and Zoom lectures have well and truly lost their novelty. Lecturers are trying their best, but like some in-person lectures, classes can get boring. Here are some proven ways to spice up your Zoom lectures, keeping yourself alert and ready to learn. Put a Read more...
How to Find a Boyfriend in Club Penguin
Posted 3:28pm Tuesday 14th April 2020 by Caroline Moratti
With Club Penguin back up and running (praise be), I thought I would use this bountiful opportunity to get something I’ve only ever dreamed about: a boyfriend. The new CP is slightly different: there’s ads on the loading page for one matter and everyone is a member. The class Read more...
A Definitive Ranking of the Uni Clocktower Bongs
Posted 3:38pm Tuesday 7th April 2020 by Kaiya Cherrington
Everytime I sit in my room, the clocktower’s flat chimes remind me that my time in this world is fleeting. Every bong that rattles through my window slowly drives me insane. Because I have nothing else to do, and to help you all feel a little bit closer to campus, I have categorised Read more...
A Tale of Two Servers: UniCol and Locals
Posted 8:48pm Thursday 2nd April 2020 by Wyatt Ryder
Good and evil. Light and dark. Yin and yang. Mine and craft. There are few things in life more wondrous than the joy of sharing a beautiful blocky world with your friends. All the epic gamers who haven’t got the new Animal Crossing are spending their lockdown on Minecraft. This Read more...
Essential Dealing: How Unlicensed Pharmacists Ensure a Clean Supply
Posted 8:23pm Wednesday 1st April 2020 by Sinead Gill
If there is ever a time for weed to be legal, it is during a pandemic. Personally, my anxiety has been at an all time high, though I am slowly learning to be kinder to myself for not being as productive as usual. Sometimes, the only way I can sleep is with a cheeky bit of the dev’s Read more...
Art Hoe Training
Posted 3:25pm Sunday 29th March 2020 by Sophia Carter Peters
Famous museums all around the world are offering virtual tours of their exhibits to help pass the endless void of time during this quarantine period. That’s right, VR isn’t just for porn. Now’s your chance to one up that flatmate that went to Europe once and never shuts up about Read more...
The Ultimate Guide to Starting a Flat Orgy
Posted 8:31pm Friday 27th March 2020 by Naomii Seah
Step one Start off nice and slow. You don’t want to spook anyone. Complain very loudly about the fact that you’re not having sex while in isolation during flat dinner, or whenever you’re all congregated together. Step two A few days later, suggest that you all watch porn Read more...
How to Party 2 Meters Apart
Posted 4:44pm Tuesday 24th March 2020 by Kaiya Cherrington
It’s that sick season and we shouldn’t be out here playing games with any virus, period. But. Dunedin has a party reputation that needs to be upheld for the sake of media articles all over New Zealand, so that our grandparents can post them on our Facebook page saying "Kyle Read more...
How to Take Feet Pics
Posted 8:42pm Thursday 19th March 2020 by Critic
For those of you whose casual employment is drying up and who are thinking about ways to make money from home by selling pictures of your feet, Critic has you covered. The feet: Literally any feet will do. The more natural, the better - leave those beautiful little toe hairs alone. Read more...
Students “In Limbo” Waiting for Covid-19 to Hit Campus
Posted 7:33pm Thursday 19th March 2020 by Sinead Gill
Otago students are “scared”, “concerned”, and “feel as if [their] whole lives are about to come toa stand-stil” over the recent Covid-19 outbreak. Last Tuesday, students came together to celebrate St Patrick’s day in what many considered the final send Read more...
What to Do in Self-Isolation
Posted 6:35pm Thursday 19th March 2020 by Henessey Griffiths
Everyone is freaking out about Coronavirus at the moment, buying mass amounts of toilet paper and hand sanitizer, just in case. The fear of the unknown has taken us over. What if it hits Dunedin? What if you get it? What if everything gets shut down and you don’t have enough supplies to last Read more...
Seagulls: An Exposé
Posted 6:33pm Thursday 19th March 2020 by Sophia Carter Peters
Seagulls, the resident shit cunts of almost every city in New Zealand. Despite interacting with them on a daily basis, there remains much unknown to the general public about them. How long can they fly? What are their intentions? Do they have a supportive father figure? One of the biggest Read more...
Kebab House
Posted 6:32pm Thursday 19th March 2020 by Kaiya Cherrington
Operating a family business can be tough. Long days, commitment to work, and family time 24/7. Yet somehow, a few full-time students and their father run a kebab shop specialising in Afghan food in a place that is very different from Afghanistan: North Dunedin. I decided to sit down and talk to Read more...
Students to Watch: Hamish and Angus
Posted 6:51pm Thursday 12th March 2020 by Oscar Paul
Hamish Todd and Angus Tylee are proof that, sometimes, a mate’s hairbrained scheme isn’t as cooked as you might first think. From a bedroom in Arana (lol) in 2017, the duo deduced that if no one else would bring drum and bass to Dunedin, then, fuck it, why couldn’t they just do it? Read more...
Up and Cuming: Burger Plant
Posted 6:49pm Thursday 12th March 2020 by Annabelle Vaughan
In recent months, anyone who has driven down Great King Street has probably noticed the absence of Golden Sun Takeaways. The once iconic, always faithful fish and chip institution has instead been replaced by a mysterious new building named ‘Burger Plant’. Upon noticing this dramatic Read more...
Bees on the Brain
Posted 6:48pm Thursday 12th March 2020 by Sophia Carter Peters
Have you ever felt a telepathic connection with honey bees? Well, you may be closer than you think. Otago’s Zoology Department has recently published a paper describing the similarities between certain bee brain waves and those of primates (including humans). Paul Szyszka, Lecturer and Read more...
(Don’t) Ask Otago
Posted 6:46pm Thursday 12th March 2020 by Caroline Moratti
DISAPPOINTING SERVICE !!!!! 3 stars Their website claims that “AskOtago offers help and support for all those who study, work or contact the University of Otago” which is clearly NOT TRUE !!! !!!!!!!!! I went to AskOtago in PERSON to ask about a mole I had that appeared to be Read more...
Big, Brown and Bi: @nudes_and_pincushions
Posted 6:18pm Thursday 12th March 2020 by Abigail Faletoese
For over a year now, Dunedin-based third year Medicine and History student, Jaya*, has been using her creativity to fill a void in our otherwise white washed Instagram feeds. Her Instagram page is full of the “artistic ramblings of an angry brown girl”, and is an eclectic mix of Read more...
Look Mom, No Hands!
Posted 6:37pm Thursday 5th March 2020 by Fox Meyer
The following are three true accounts of wet dreams. For the record, wet dreams are totally normal, and rarely this messy. These are the greatest cum-capers, the crème de la crème, the (e)Mission Impossible of nocturnal emissions. Enjoy at the lads’ expense. #1 Woke up from Read more...
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